Courage
by entre-lagrimas-y-suspiros
Summary: Hermione needs to find the courage to break the cycle with Ron and find her happiness. Warning: a bit of Ron-bashing and drunkenness. Nothing graphic though. Minerva/Hermione femslash. Oneshot


**May 16, 2007: Rose's 1st birthday**

Everyone around the table seemed to freeze as Ron's glass slammed onto the wood. "Why does everything have to be the way you say, ha? Did it occur to you that no one wants to listen to a fucking sermon? It's a party! Just shut it, will you."

Hermione felt her cheeks flood with color as her heart hammered against her ribcage. _Not again, please God not again_, she thought. She should have known. It was almost as predictable as the seasons. Ronald never could hold his liquor and his outburst were sure to follow the tenth shoot of fire-whiskey. When had she lost count? Why wasn't she paying more attention? She knew how to avoid these situations. Hermione had made avoiding airing their laundry in public into an art form, but everyone once in a while when she was enjoying herself too much to keep close tabs on Ron all hell seem to break loose. Hermione was enjoying herself a good deal. They were celebrating her baby girl's first birthday, after all what reason could there be not to enjoy herself? She gave a small prayer of thanks that the little ones were playing inside. When she thought about it, his actions shouldn't be such a shock to any of them, he had done it a few times after she got pregnant with Rose, and now...she dropped her hand to her still flat belly. She supposed it was safe to say that it would be the same this time around. Maybe it was his natural reaction to her being pregnant. _What the hell kind of man did that? _She tried to push the thought aside. It wouldn't help the situation any if she allowed it to affect her. She kept her eyes downcast, hoping the storm would pass without further incident.

"See, now you've ruined it. Good going 'Ermione." The tension seemed to triple and along with her heartbeat.

"Come on, Ron, let me show you the car Arthur and I have been working on."

Hermione waited for Harry to successfully pull Ronald away towards the shed, before slowly looking up and around the table. Most of them didn't meet her gaze. George and Ginny looked at her with equals parts sympathy and anger towards their brother. There was sympathy in Molly's brown eyes too but there was no anger there towards Ron. She dropped her eyes before she could look into Minerva's emerald orbs. It was only the second time Minerva had witness one of their scenes, but Hermione was scared to see the disappointment. Hogwarts' Headmistress had always believed in her, and had always spoken of the brightest of futures for her. _You will be good in everything you do, Hermione, you don't know how to be anything else. _Then why couldn't she be good at this? Why was it that she was good at everything, except being a good wife? Why couldn't she be good at marriage? The question echoed in her mind, and she felt her eyes beginning to sting with tears. She stood slowly from the table, fixing her perfectly smooth robes before turning slowly from the table. "I think I'll check on Rose."

[]

"Look Hermione, I taught Victorie to dance." Hermione tried to smile at Teddy as he pulled her six year old niece along with him around the room, while little Molly shouted, "My turn. Teddy teach me. My turn." Usually the kids' antics were enough to distract her from anything that might be going on amongst the adults, but tonight was different. She felt wounded and humiliated. Everyone could see the sham of life she had, and the only thing Hermione could do was hold her infant daughter, rocking her slightly. She hoped Rose would never know the kind of pain she was feeling.

"It's not fair, Aunt Hermione." Molly's wining prevented her from getting lost in her thoughts.

"Yes, sweetie?"

"Tell him."

"Molly, Aunt Hermione is tired. Why don't all you go show everyone outside your little dance?"

Hermione looked between Audrey and the children, and felt the urge to cry once more. She swallowed it down. Despite everything, Hermione wasn't going to allow anyone to see her cry. Ron might not be able to help himself from making a joke of their marriage, he might even enjoy it, but she wasn't going to make a spectacle of herself.

"Come on. Freddie you take Lucy, I'll take your sister and Louis." Audrey waited for the kids to head out the door before she turned back to Hermione. "Would you like me to take Rosie too?"

"We're fine, thanks." She followed Audrey with her eyes as she left. When she looked at the door her gaze landed on the form of Minerva McGonagall, looking back at her with a hard expression. Hermione felt her heart sink. She dropped her gaze back to Rose's sleeping form, but she was aware of the door closing and Minerva's footsteps moving towards her. Minerva sat next to her on the sofa and showed an unusually amount of caring and emotion as she wrapped an arm around Hermione's shoulder. Hermione felt her chest constrict and it became increasing hard to fight off the tears.

"I want you to listen to me very carefully, Hermione. You know I hate to meddle. I feel I have no right, but I cannot let what happen tonight go unnoticed." Hermione stiffen and Minerva gave a little squeeze. "I will only speak of this once, so please hear me out." She gave a small nod and Minerva continued. "You are by far the most intelligent, kind, and courageous person that I've ever taught. That being said, you are letting him lead astray, letting him treat you like an idiot. You deserve better than this." Hermione dropped her chin to her chest and shut her eyes tightly, feeling as if the world was crumbling around her. "Hermione, my dear, brave, beautiful, Hermione." Minerva inched her chin up with her hand making Hermione look at her. She didn't want to open her eyes, but Minerva's intense gaze was on her and she gave in. "You deserve better than him. So does your child." Her vision blurred, before Hermione felt the briefest brush of lips on her own.

**July 31, 2007: Harry's 27th Birthday**

Ginny handed her a butter-beer as she refilled her own wine glass. "I can't believe you wanted so long to tell me, I'm hurt." Hermione smiled at her friend's silliness. "When are you due?"

"The healer said around the 28th of November, but if he is anything like Rose..."

"He'll be late." Ginny supplied and Hermione nodded. "Does anyone else know? Besides you two I mean."

"Molly guessed when she saw me last month. I had to beg her not to tell everyone." Hermione left the reason why she hadn't want anyone to make a fuss about her coming son. Ronald didn't seem taken by the thought of another child at all. His most responsive moment had been at the last checkup when they had told them it was a boy. He had smiled brightly at her then, and she had seen a flash of the boy she'd fallen in love with.

Ginny look her over and shrug, "You wont be able to keep it a secrete for much longer."

"I though maybe today might be a good day to tell the rest of the family, if Harry doesn't mind."

"If I don't mind what?"

"I'm pregnant." Hermione smiled at his shocked expression and the hug he swept her into as soon as he could get his feet moving again.

"Congratulations, love."

She gave him a quick peck on the cheek as thanks, but his reaction had meant so much more to her. Here was the love and joy she had thought to receive from Ronald when she told him, but hadn't received.

"Congratulation for what?" Ron said grabbing another beer from the icebox.

"For the baby, you moron." Ginny said with a laugh, but Ron couldn't even be bothered to crack a smile.

"Speaking of, the one we already have is crying up a storm in the other room. I can't even hear the tele."

Hermione nodded, instantly getting up and trying to make as little as possible of his behavior. She wasn't going to ruin Harry's day. "I'll go get her."

Harry shook his head, "Don't go, I'll bring her too you. Come Ron, let's go set up the tele on the patio so it's ready when everyone else gets here." Ron nodded head for the backyard. "I'm just gonna get Rose."

When Ginny pulled her into another hug, Hermione was unable to return it. She didn't want their pity. She didn't need it. She only wished that things could be as they once where. When Ron had loved her so much she had been his first concern. "His a prat, just ignore him." She nodded, but how could she ever ignore him? She loved him so much before, she loved him still. Though when he said something like that, something meant to hurt her, which was happening more and more often, she couldn't help wondering just how long that love would last. How long could love last when it was left to tend to itself? When it was under attack at every turn?

**October 5, 2007: Minerva's 82nd Birthday **

She could feel Ronald's eyes follow her around their small den. Rose was napping in her playpen and the radio was giving the latest Quidditch news. She closed the file she was reviewing and placed in on one of the many piles littering the desk. She was exhausted, but the work had to be done. The law had to be able to keep up with wizards and witches, as well as other members of the magical community, and it was her job to see that it did even if it meant bringing most of it home for the weekend.

"Aren't you going to have tea with McGonagall?" She took off her spectacles and rubbed her eyes. "Isn't today her birthday or something?"

Hermione stared at him. Ronald wasn't the type of man to remember her own birthday if Harry didn't remind him by mention every so often for a month before hand. Why had he remembered Minerva's? Sure, Hermione had made a habitat of spending at least some of the day with her friend, but this year...after what happened, Hermione didn't really feel comfortable with it. She wanted to see her, to talk to her but she couldn't think of what to say to her. "No, she cancelled." She lied, and as she did her hand touch the box where she kept all the unanswered letters Minerva had sent her over the months.

"So you're staying in all day? Working on a Saturday?"

She blinked. Pushing all thoughts of her mentor and friend away as she put her spectacles back on and started reviewing another file. "Yes."

"I think mum, might like to see Rose. Ginny is taking boys, I think."

Hermione looked back up at him, a twinge of uncertainty starting in her gut. Something was off. Ron hadn't been this calm, this nice to her when she was working longer than she'd like to admit. He had been getting worst as in the past months, so the sudden interest in her wellbeing was strange. "You want to go? Is Harry going? I know how you dislike getting stuck with just us girls for company."

"I don't think so, he was meeting Dean and Seamus in London. You're right I don't want to go, but you should. In fact I'll fire-call to let her know you're coming."

Suspicion ate away at her, but she didn't want to second-guess him. Nothing good ever can out of second-guessing his wishes. _Orders, _the logical part of her mind supplied but she ignored it. She wasn't going to pick a fight over a visit to the Burrow. Molly always loved to have her over, and if Ginny really were going then it would be a lovely day of light cooking, a little gossip, and a lot of playing with the kids. "All right, I'll get ready." She closed the file backup and looked at Ron. "Will you be joining them?"

Ron turned from the door. "What if I did?"

She swallowed and tried to smile. "Nothing, I was just wondering."

"Don't."

She forced a smile. She would have given him her usual, 'sure thing honey' but sometimes it was better to simply keep her mouth shut.

[]

She looked up when Harry knocked on her office door. "You wanted to see me?" He asked waving around the interdepartmental memo she had sent him that morning.

"Yeah, thanks for coming."

Harry gave her a little smile, "Hermione, seriously? It's me, now what's going on? Are you ok?"

The concern in his voice sometimes sent her for a loop. It was almost as if he was preparing himself for the time she would answer no, that she wasn't, and then everything around them would shift, twist, and break. Hermione would never tell him, even when she wasn't ok. When she was far from it, Hermione kept it to herself. "Actually, its silly. Ron came home the last week without his cap, I was sort of hopping it was still at your house."

Harry's eyebrows inched up. "When did he loose it?"

"Last Saturday."

"I went out with Dean and Seamus."

"He joined you, didn't he?"

Harry stayed very still. She could almost see the wheels in his head turning, trying to find a way out of the dead end street he was in. She gave him over. "You're right, I forget. Ron said he went out with Neville that night, not you. It's probably in his flat." They stared at each other for a moment, both knowing the words that had been spoken for what they were, a lie…a ridiculous lie at that. She swallowed down the remnants of her long-ago shattered pride, and gave Harry her brightest smile. "I'll call him and ask."

Harry nodded. "Right, umm, ok. I have to get back to work."

"Sure, thanks Harry."

He turned towards the door and then back. "If he ever goes out with Neville out of the blue again, you should drop by house. We always love to have you."

Hermione gave him a nod, his words bringing her emotions too close to the surface.

**December 24th, 2007: Christmas Eve**

Hermione sat in the rocking chair in the sitting room surrounded by boxes of Christmas tree decorations she had taken out of the basement early, and a pile of gifts waiting to be wrapped and delivered. Her son stirred her arms, his tiny body wiggling and struggling against his blanket, and another high cry filled the silence.

"He should be asleep by now, and Rose should have been in bed hours ago, but no you wanted to spend time with her. She is a toddler Hermione, for Merlin's sake." Ron said in that rough tone that sent alarm bells off in her mind.

"I'll take her upstairs." She was still moving a bit slow, her body hadn't yet bounced back completely from giving birth. It had only been nineteen days, it would take another week for her to be back to her old self completely.

"No, you stay and put Hugo to sleep." She nodded sitting down once more and rocking him softly while Ron took Rose to her crib. "You see little one, Daddy isn't that bad. It's only stress. He works so hard." She had convinced herself that everything was fine with that same excuse countless times.

"What's this?" Hermione was startled by the question. She had been nodding off and hadn't hear him come back down. "Why is the Ministry sending you work?"

Hermione placed Hugo and his basinet, and casted a silencing charm around him. She knew what was coming, and it wasn't going to be quiet. "I asked Padma to keep me apprised of things."

"Are you planning on going back to work?" His steely gaze turned menacingly.

"Could we do this later, please?"

"We are doing this now or did you not hear my question!"

Hermione hated that she started shaking, and she felt something she hadn't felt in a very long time, anger. Pure anger. What right did he have to put her through this again? She wasn't going to stop working, no matter how many children they had. She would damn if she gave up the last bit of her life that still belonged to her. "Yes, I will be going back to work at the end of January."

"I thought we'd been through this. I told you back in April, you are not going to do this to me again."

Her heart pumped wildly in her chest. How could he? Where he did get off thinking, he could recriminate her about anything? After everything, he had put her through in the last two years? How dare he? _Not this time. _"About what you're doing to me?"

"What the hell are you talking about?"

"Despite everything that I've allowed to happen since we married, I have not taken leave of my senses. I know that you're seeing someone else. I tried to convince myself otherwise, because what kind of man would cheat on the mother of his children, on the very pregnant mother of his children? I didn't want to believe it. Even after everything...I wanted to excuse you. I wanted to believe the best about you."

Ron tensed up. "So, what if I am?"

"I'm not going to stand for it. Look at you, standing there like if this is nothing. As if you haven't become the worst sort of man. I have let you humiliate me and put me down, hoping that you would change because I loved you, but I don't love you anymore I was just scared of loosing everything." She laughed, "Silly when you think about it. This marriage was lost two years ago. It's only the kids that have kept it going, and my fears, but this is the last straw. I'm not just going to lie down and take this!" She shouted.

"What are you going to do?" Ron asked face darkening further.

Hermione couldn't contain her laughter. Her mind was made up, and she felt lighter than she had in a very long time. "I'm going to do what I should have done when Rose was born, I'm divorcing you."

She tried to grab the basinet, but Ron moved quicker and grabbed her arm. "You aren't going anywhere."

"Let go of me Ron, or I'm going to hex you and this time it wont be enchanted paper birds." She held his gaze until her let her go. She took Hugo and headed for the stairs to get Rose. She was leaving.

[]

Hermione felt the cold sea air sink into her body, as she disapparated at the end of Shore Street. She couldn't see Stonehaven's harbor very well in the darkness, but the sound of waves rocking the boats and crashing into beach only a few meters away was unmistakable. She hugged her children closer to her and stepped up to the stonewall that separated the property from the rest of the village and touch it. A tabby-cat patronous appeared a few moments later. "Yes?"

"Minerva, it's Hermione."

The gate creaked open and she could just make out the light flooding out of the front door of the house at the top of the hill. The climb was exhausting in her condition, neither the cold nor the weight the children in her arms help much. "Are you all right?" Minerva met her about half way up with a worried expression. "Hermione?"

"I'm fine."

"Give, her to me."

Hermione handed Rose's sleepy form over and took a breath. "This hill is a lot steeper than I remember."

Minerva didn't answer. She threaded her arm through Hermione's, instead, and helped her along. Inside the warm house, Hermione became aware of Minerva's state of undress. The older woman had gone out in only her nightshirt, and though it was obviously flannel, the woman must her freezing. "You should get warm." She said through her own chattering teeth.

"I'm rather more concern for all of you." She watched Minerva stock the fire, so that it blazed. She moved around the room quickly transfiguring the sofa into a bed and placing first Rose and then Hugo on it. "Poor darlings." She heard her say as her cast a warming charm on a blanket covered them with, before doing the same and dropping the second blanket on Hermione's legs.

"I woke you." Hermione said regretting putting the woman out in anyway though she couldn't quiet regret being there, not while looking into Minerva's still concerned green eyes. She had missed her a great deal. "I'm sorry about not writing back."

"Would you like a cup of tea to warm up?"

She nodded, "Minerva..."

"I didn't really expect you to after the first two that went unanswered, and it's fine. I knew what I did would put you off."

Hermione opened her mouth to answer but Minerva had walked out of the sitting room and disappearing down the long hallway that bisect the house. She turned back to the fire. She hadn't been put off exactly. It had surprised her a great deal. It shocked her, really. It had taken her a longtime to get over it, but she had done so a few months back, only it wasn't always easy to apologize. She knew she had to. It was unfair for Minerva to keep thinking that.

"Here," Hermione took the offered cup and sip at it, contentment and warmth filling her as Minerva sat across from her. "Are you sure you're all right?"

"Yes."

"What happened?"

"I left him." She said matter of fact, and wasn't at all surprised when a wide smile broke across Minerva's lips.

"For good?"

"Yes." She held the green gaze in silence for moment, studying Minerva before leaning across the space and stretching her hand to take Minerva's. "You were right, my kids deserve better."

"As do you my dear."

Hermione nodded, and smile. "I know, thanks to you."

"I didn't do anything."

"You did, what you said on Rose's birthday...it took me a while digest, but it was those words that finally made me realize I could have it better. I want better Minerva, and I've come here to find it." She looked intently into green eyes.

"Perhaps we should talk about this in the morning. You're exhausted and should think it over."

"We will talk in the morning, but I wont change my mind."

"You're sure?"

Hermione nodded, bringing the hand she held to her lips. "Happy Christmas, Minerva."

"Happy Christmas, my dear, a very happy Christmas indeed." Hermione saw green eyes sparkle as joy flashed from their depths. She smiled as she felt that same joy fill her heart. It felt good. She hadn't felt that good in a very long time.

**FIN.**


End file.
